The Raw Truth about Self-Care.

There is something important to question in the way we’ve been conditioned to be in the world.

The material paradigm: meet physical needs first to feel safe
Take Maslow’s pyramid of needs. The first time I saw it, I was puzzled. I would have placed it upside down. Instead of meeting physical security needs first and then ascending toward self-realization, I sensed the opposite: when we remember who we are, our truth, everything else can flow more naturally.

So what is the link with self-care?
Here is how most people practice self-care today:

They work hard from an inner state of lack → make money to feel safe → invest in self-care or self-denial through consumption → feel temporary relief → return to contraction and overwork.
Do you recognize yourself? I do.

I choose self-care over self-denial, yet I understand that both are ways to relieve pain. Self-care is certainly healthier for the body than self-denial, but both often remain in the same loop. I believed this too, until I saw the way out of this cycle, where self-care becomes compensation and consumption.

When we live in survival mode, the body stays in tension. In truth, many people live in survival mode, sometimes at different levels of income, until they reconnect with their true identity. Survival is often associated with scarcity, yet it is more about chasing success without realizing that we are already enough. We are already a success. What we are chasing is what we already carry within us, but have forgotten.

How overwork under tension impacts the body and “aging”
The fascia, the connective tissue enveloping all organs,holds this contraction like a defense system. Over time, it loses elasticity and its capacity to support structure. This is often when we see skin sagging. Our face and body don’t look old, they look tired, worn down by chronic tension and collapse.

We associate tired skin with aging. This reminds me of a true story of a nun who lived a stress-free life. At sixty, she looked thirty, radiant skin, calm presence, deep vitality.

This is where true self-care begins

Care first.

Simple, free, daily acts: lying down during the day, warmth, baths, sunlight, silence, unstructured time, slow walking, kind words toward ourselves, compassion, and celebrating both our successes and our failures—because stepping out of the comfort zone takes courage.

From there: safety, clarity, and then money follows.
Not the other way around.

The real secret
I am sharing here the real secret, not of not growing old, but of not growing tired under constant tension.
People are not getting older. They are getting exhausted.

Soothing loving care messages.

I am safe.
My body is safe.
I allow my body to relax.
I allow it to feel loved.

I allow my tissues to soften, reorganize, and renew.
My fascia is living intelligence, responsive and wise.
I give it permission to restore elasticity, with ease and time.

I imagine a slow, warm, hydrating flow moving through my body.

My body is not separate from my soul.
I live from wholeness, not from defense.

Conclusion
Our body has an innate capacity to renew itself—when we provide the right internal and external environment.
It begins with care.
Loving, gentle, conscious care.